As a newbie to the sport, I arrived early for my first game to scope out the situation and of course, cruise the crowd. As I stood on the sidelines, I thought, “What the hell did I get myself into?” I hadn’t played dodgeball since the fourth grade, and that was decades ago. Sports and I don’t normally go hand and hand. But I had heard so many good things about this league, that it was fun, easy and a great way to meet people, so I figured why not? What did I have to lose?
The gym was much smaller than expected; with a net separating the two courts so that four teams could play at once. Lady Gaga was blasting from the stage, refs were blowing whistles, players were yelling, running, jumping – a few dancing – while balls were being thrown in rapid succession and with surprising speed. It was total chaos.
Once on the court, it was indeed non-stop action - something I’ve never been opposed to – and surprisingly, not as intimidating as originally anticipated. During the first game, my approach was to lay low, but I quickly realized everyone gets picked off sooner than later, even the most experienced players. So, I promptly jumped in to action and by my third game, the adrenaline was pumping at full speed as we were up 2 games to none. I quickly started dodging balls, slid across the floor to fetch another and found the balls to throw, literally. By the sixth game, I felt fierce and invincible, especially since one of my fellow newbies kept praising me for my prowess on the court.
With this boost to my confidence, I was all over the place and having a blast. Picking out members of the opposing team I wanted to nail with the ball, including a guy I actually once nailed. It was totally fun and I even managed to take out my former trick. But let me tell ya, karma is a bitch.
With 2 minutes left in the hour of play, I found myself in the back corner internally patting myself on the back for a game well played, when suddenly the dude in front of me ducked and a ball smacked me directly in the right eye. That shit came so hard and so fast; it dropped me to my knees and literally knocked out my contact lens.
Today, I’m a little battered and bruised with a bloody eye, but I must admit, it was great fun and well worth it - we won. And let's face it, that bruised eye totally ups my butch quotient. Now let’s just hope next week I can keep my eye on the ball instead of my former tricks.
